blog 10
31 Mar 2011 4 Comments
Lately my blogs have followed one pattern and that pattern being experiments, but after this weeks readings I decided to get a little more personal. Let’s begin with I already know I’m going to hear I’m so sorry from people and I appreciate it, but after 7 years of I’m so sorry. I just want someone to listen to me. So, here it goes. I was 13 living with my mom, sister, and stepdad. My mom worked days and my step dad worked seconds so he took us to school. My sister was staying home (at grandmas) from school that day sick. So, I got up and got ready as usual for school. We had two vehicles. (One a beat up work van and the other a brand new sports car) I’m ashamed to say this, but I was so into myself that I had to ride in the sports car because the van was embarrassing. My mom had taken the sports car to work that day leaving us to take the beat up work van. Some days my step dad would stop by my mom’s work (which was two minutes away) and trade cars so he could use the sports car for the day. This day was warm outside so I knew all of my friends would be standing outside of the school, so I begged my step dad to please take me to trade vehicles. This is where things begin to get difficult for me to continue typing. I still remember the sounds and smells. I heard the washer running and could smell the fresh air outside because the window was open. I was standing in the kitchen begging him to trade cars when he said to me if you let me touch your breasts I’ll give you anything you want. I remember pausing then laughing thinking he was joking. Still in shock my step dad would even joke about this. I began to say I’d rather walk to school and went to walk away as he grabbed my arm forcefully. I won’t continue because I’m sure most of you know where it leads to. After the incident he didn’t trade cars, but I didn’t care. I felt so numb that the day of school felt like a blur. I went into the girl’s bathroom and curled up crying and sitting next to my own vomit. My best friend found me and all I said was I didn’t feel good. I was sent home that day. My grandma came to pick me up. My grandma knew something more was wrong with me when I couldn’t even look her in the face. She badgered until I told her. As I told her I watched her fall to the ground crying. She called my mom who left work. In the end he went to jail, and my mom chose him over me. So, after that day I lived with my grandparents from then on out.
blog 9
23 Mar 2011 2 Comments
Let’s keep on the roll of hey, I like taking matters into my own hands and trying things out. So experiment number three. I gave my boyfriend a break and decided to use my roommate. She is struggling to pay for her schooling even after financial aid. I won’t give her name as part of our agreement J.
So, here goes our first question,
- “What would you do for a job to help for college?”
Answer: “Anything I have to do, I really want to become a kindergarten teacher.”
- Would you strip for money?
Answer: No, because I have a boyfriend, but if I didn’t have a boyfriend I’d consider it.
- Wouldn’t you think it would be frowned upon wanting to become a teacher and being a stripper?
Answer: Yes, but I have to have an education. I work now at a local restaurant, but still can’t pay for school. Its hard enough as it is. I just want to finish school and do something better with my life, and how can I do that if I can’t even pay?
- Do you think most college students consider stripping, especially in Fort Wayne?
Answer: Yes, young girls do I think. I know several in my classes who have said they know of strippers and how much cash strippers have. It’s a lot of pressure to be something and have things.
After this experiment, I started thinking to myself would I ever do this? It’s against my religion, I have a boyfriend, but honestly I could use the money and I like feeling sexy. But are these things worth it? To me they aren’t, but to some girls they are.
blog 8
23 Mar 2011 1 Comment
Let’s begin with my place isn’t to pick up after you! After last week’s blog I actually wanted to try another experiment. So, I decided I would do the cooking and see how much of the cleaning I could muster out of my boyfriend. So instead of our usual date night or movie night, it became try anything and everything I slave to cook for you and then you pick up the mess I make. Since, I pick up after you each day, every day! So, I made foods he loved knowing that it would make him happy. The first evening I made homemade lasagna (all fresh vegetables), and homemade oatmeal raisin cookies (his favorite) and after we finished eating I said,” Kody. I’ve had a long day do you think you could do the cleaning tonight.” The expression on his face was like I just dropped a bomb on our house. He came up with a few different excuses. First, was but March Madness. Second, was well you can just do the cleaning tomorrow Alex. Then came the third excuse cleaning isn’t a man’s job. That’s what set me over the edge. So, I made sure he knew I was angry. I slammed every pot, sighed when I wiped things down, and acted like he didn’t exist. That night we didn’t speak. The next day I did my usual routine. Got up, got ready, went to class, and then came back to the apartments and worked out. I decided to give Kody one more chance at cleaning. So, that night I made another homemade dinner, and at the end of the dinner he offered to clean up. All I could say to him was, I love you but the fact I had to throw a fit for you to wash a dish makes me infuriated. He smiled and said from now on there will be no you cleaning there will be us cleaning.
blog 7
02 Mar 2011 3 Comments
Juliet:
“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
by any other name would smell as sweet.”
This quote was written by William Shakespeare. It is one that made me think of the article written about taking her last name. Sadly, they have two different meanings, but really in terms of last name it’s just a name. People make a big deal about last names. So, I decided to do some research of my own and I asked my loving boyfriend if he would take my last name if I asked him to. His reply was no, I’m not suppose to. I asked what or who defines what your suppose to do. He replied he didn’t know who made that rule, but he knows that it wouldn’t look good if he did. This became a heated argument at this point (even though I don’t want him to take my last name) I began to get upset wanting to know why he couldn’t. I hate that people put such strain on things such as a name. If choosing to be a Mahan instead of a Stahl is that big of an issue why are we at war with other countries because really people in our own country make things difficult to be individuals? Didn’t we fight for freedom of speech and choice at one point? I guess that fight wasn’t worth anything because today a woman can’t ask her husband to change his last name instead of her changing hers.
